Showing posts with label how to.. Show all posts
Showing posts with label how to.. Show all posts

October 7, 2011

how to: disappear all evening.


disclaimer:
this only works if you're completely devoted to fall television.
and hulu.
otherwise,
you probably shouldn't read on.
if you aren't as pathetic as me,
i tip my hat to you.
for, i fall victim to thursday night every week.


step 1: pour a cup of piping hot chocolate.
...two cups, actually. yes, two.
you need them both. trust me.

step 2: start with zooey d., the wizard, and schmidt.

step 3: move on to will and christina.
up all night.
[it's possible that nbc wrote television personalities of jake and court. largely possible. and hilarious.]

step 4: [liiiike i needed another t.v. obsession...]
pan am.
 world traveling.
frank sinatra ALL THE TIME.
trilingual flight attendants.
it's like hulu was begging me to watch.
and i heeded the call.


5. the vampire diaries.
ty and caroline... i want them to have invincible hybrid babies.
[oh my gosh. i'm one of thoooose people.]

step 7:  watch grey's anatomy. pray it gets better.
seriously. i'm feeling a little bit let down already. it wasn't even picture worthy tonight.

step 8: ensconce yourself in some eucalyptus spearmint before bed.
this magic serum might as well be my boyfriend, i'm serious.


...
 your act will go famously.
money back guarantee.

and if you don't disappear?
don't blame the blood suckers, surgeons, new girls, or me.
you just clearly were not meant for thursday night t.v. catch up.