October 16, 2012

dear everyone-who-is-thinking-about-not-voting-next-month:

first of all, i think you're an idiot.
sorry, but not really.
you just sort of... are. by definition.



Informal . an utterly foolish or senseless person.

i, like most people in this country (well, the less ignorant ones, anyway), watched the second presidential debate tonight. alongside my television screen was my computer, following the comments of the entire world, via twitter & facebook. some, like chris rock's, made me want to kill myself... just thinking about there being such uninformed lunatics at the voting booths... it makes me want to scream. others, like elisabeth hasselbeck's, instilled hope in an educated american people. (thanks for standing up for smart celebrities, E. i knew they were out there, somewhere.)

but what's worse?
comments like these:

"i'm voting for mickey mouse."
"i am not voting. neither of the candidates care about me specifically, anyway."
"what is with all of this bickering? can't we all get along? why does it matter how we get there if we're all trying to end up in the same place?"
"i hate contention. contention is contentious. let me say contention 400 more times because i want to show everyone how non-contentious i am."
"i would so much rather watch family guy than the debate."

first of all, whenever anybody praises "family guy", their opinion about anything else automatically becomes invalidated in my book. do you know those people?
 "have you seen that episode of family guy where..."
"no. no, i haven't." 
glad i got that off my chest. 
now, second, pleeeeeease. 
step up to the plate, america. seriously. grow up, educate yourselves, do the work, listen to the speeches, the debates.... anything! lest we not confuse the other countries, we are people of substance, people with values, morale... we are people of joy, people who fight for it. 

so, this november, get off your high horse, your soap box--get off your ass, and DO SOMETHING. do anything. vote for whoever you would like. that's the beauty of it all--you have that right. do something about it while you still can... before government takeover is shifted into high gear. cancel out a vote if that's the only motivation to get you to a poll. and if for no other reason, vote because your posterity is at stake whether you would like to believe it or not. 

i will vote for mitt romney, and i'd like anyone who would like to take a swing at me for that to come at me. because at least that would mean you're making a valiant effort to contribute, and i appreciate that.

"dwight! you ignorant slut!"
i've just always wanted to use that phrase, and it seemed relatively appropriate here.


  1. Thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you. As a politics undergrad, people who say they're going to vote for Mickey Mouse, or their best friend, make me want to puke. Not saying that I'm better than anyone else, but I do try to be as informed as I can be. Wrote something similar to this on my blog today, too.

  2. Yep. Yep. Yep. I couldn't agree more. My favorite one is, "My vote doesn't make a difference." K YOU FUGLY FAGGOT. ha. haha.


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